By: “How To Survive As A Woman”
Domestic Violence, NFL, Ray McDonald (Redskins), Ray Rice, and Who Else?
49ers Player Arrested On Domestic Violence Charges Post NFL’s New ‘Ray Rice Rule’
“BALTIMORE (WJZ)— Just a few days after the NFL creates stricter penalties for domestic abusers, another player is charged with beating his fiancée.”
In America as in all cultures and societies, Domestic Violence is a black eye on the face of humanity. In many cultures, people look the other way or turn a blind eye on the subject of Domestic Violence. Here in America it is now an epidemic, a difficult to explain madness that is afflicting every level of society.
Most recently are the examples with our sports icons who are outstanding in their athletic abilities and competitions, however, have now been arrested by the authorities and are now associated with a serious problem, Domestic Violence.
What exactly is Domestic Violence? Well according to the “National Coalition Against Domestic Violence” the definition right forward:
“Domestic violence is the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior perpetrated by an intimate partner against another. It is an epidemic affecting individuals in every community, regardless of age, economic status, race, religion, nationality or educational background.
Violence against women is often accompanied by emotionally abusive and controlling behavior, and thus is part of a systematic pattern of dominance and control. Domestic violence results in physical injury, psychological trauma, and sometimes death. The consequences of domestic violence can cross generations and truly last a lifetime.”
In researching the many facts and statistics regard Domestic Violence, the information just flows out in an extreme abundance, and it definitely cries out for major analysis. Just to mention a few examples:
1. One in every four women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime.
2. An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year.
3. Eighty Five percent of domestic violence victims are women.
4. Historically, females have been most often victimized by someone they knew.
5. Females who are Twenty to twenty four years of are the greatest risk of nonfatal intimate partner violence.
6. Most cases of domestic violence are never reported.
In addressing the results, the manifestations, of domestic violence, we can conclude that it is adverse in every way. The children and especially the children who actually witness the violent behavior we note the following:
7. Witnessing violence between one’s parents or caretakers is the strongest risk factor of transmitting violent behavior from one generation to the next.
8. Boys who witness domestic violence are twice as likely to abuse their own partners and children when they become adults.
9. Thirty to sixty percent of perpetrators of intimate partner violence also abuse children in the household.
What about the matter of sexual assault within an intimate partner relationship? Again the answers are troubling:
10. One in Six women and One in thirty three men have experienced an attempted or completed rape
11. Nearly 7.8 million women have been raped by an intimate partner at some point in their lives.
12. Sexual assault or forced sex occurs in approximately forty to forty five percent of battering relationships.
Does Domestic violence reach the point of actual physical harm or even death? Unfortunately the answer to that question is very disturbing.
13. Almost one-third of female homicide victims that are reported in police records are killed by an intimate partner.
14. In seventy to eighty percent of intimate partner homicides, no matter which partner was killed, the man physically abused the woman before the murder.
In any initial analysis, the first question that comes to mind is; why would a woman tolerate or put up with any behavior that would bring her harm or put her children in danger? The reported reasons can be difficult to comprehend as exemplified by the following:
1. When asked questions regarding her received abuse, the woman has responded in a manner of minimizing the conduct saying, it was all her fault, that she mistakenly caused her partner to act violently.
2. The women may manifest a lack of self-esteem, with feelings of inadequacy, thinking she could not convince another man to love her.
3. The woman may also be a victim of mental and physical abuse from her own father, giving her the feeling of comfort in an abusive relationship.
4. The abusive partner has effectively convinced the woman that she and she alone is deserving of this abusive treatment, and she is responsible for forcing him to abuse her in this manner.
1. The amount of terror and insecurity felt by the children is incalculable. Children who hear or who personally eye witness the abuse, are confused, shaken and horrified.
2. The children are shocked to see the two people they should love, however, one is severely hurting the other. The love they once HAD for the father quickly turns to hatred, accompanied by extreme fear and a lasting deep seated resentment.
3. The memories and recoiled feelings often return and replayed in the minds of the children far into adulthood. These memories and feelings will often times last a lifetime.
1. It was thought that men who have personal or employment difficulties are the only ones that come abusive to intimate partners. This has proven to be false as every level of a man is realized.
2. He mistakenly believes his behavior is acceptable, because his father abused his mother.
3. He also mistakenly believes his behavior is what a true man should do in taking control of his woman, to be macho and manly.
4. In reality the man is in need of immediate mental help and a complete psychiatric evaluation, followed by the necessary treatment.
As an American society we need to stop pretending that the plague of Domestic Violence does not exist. We must label it as it truly is; a wrong that is unacceptable, consequential and punishable accordingly.
1. Tjaden, Patricia & Thoennes, Nancy. National Institute of Justice and the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention, “Extent, Nature and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence: Findings from the National. Violence against Women Survey,” (2000).
2. Costs of Intimate Partner Violence against Women in the United States. 2003. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control. Atlanta, GA.
3. Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, February 2003.
4. U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, “Criminal Victimization, 2005,” September 2006.
5. U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, “Intimate Partner Violence in the United States,” December 2006.
6. Frieze, I.H., Browne, A. (1989) Violence in Marriage. In L.E. Ohlin & M. H. Tonry (eds.) Family Violence. Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press.
7. Break the Cycle. (2006). Startling Statistics. http://www.breakthecycle.org/html%20files/I_4a_startstatis.htm.
8. Strauss, Gelles, and Smith, “Physical Violence in American Families: Risk Factors and Adaptations to Violence” in 8,145 Families. Transaction Publishers (1990).
9. Edelson, J.L. (1999). “The Overlap between Child Maltreatment and Woman Battering.” Violence against Women. 5:134-154.
10. U.S. Department of Justice, “Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Violence Against Women,” November 1998.
11. Costs of Intimate Partner Violence against Women in the United States. 2003. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control. Atlanta, GA.
12. Campbell, et al. (2003). “Assessing Risk Factors for Intimate Partner Homicide.” Intimate Partner Homicide, NIJ Journal, 250, 14-19. Washington, D.C.: National Institute of Justice, U.S. Department of Justice.
13. Federal Bureau of Investigation, Uniform Crime Reports “Crime in the United States, 2000,” (2001).
14. U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, “Intimate Partner Violence in the United States,” December 2006.